Out of high school, I worked at least two jobs, sometimes three, all while going to college full-time. I was fortunate that my mother got me through college, so I didn't have to work to get myself through school...but I did feel I needed to buy my "happiness" at that point in my life. I always had really nice clothes, nails done and paid to go anywhere I wanted....but I didn't get out much anyway... My life felt meaningless. I felt like I had no real purpose.
After college, I went straight into corporate America with my Business degree, and there I was...working, making a living....but everything felt like I was just going through the motions. I wasn't enjoying life. For me, life = work. I had nice things. But, what's the point of getting dressed up if you have no where to go?
Fast forward two years, I met Chad while working part-time in a jewelry store that I worked at on nights and weekends. Catching on to the pattern? All I did was work. But I'm not complaining - had it not been for working that part-time job, I would have never met Chad, quite literally the man of my dreams. After working with him for 5 short hours, he left for the day and I looked at the store manager, a friend of both of ours, and said "I'm going to marry him." :) The manager just chuckled.
Fast forward two more years, Chad and I are married with baby Grace. I still worked full time, but I at least felt like I had more of a purpose. I was a wife and a mother. Someone needed me. (I tend to want to be needed.) Shortly thereafter, I was baptized. Life had only gotten BETTER since then.
When Grace turned 3, we soon found out that she was going to be a big sister. Grace was in an in-home childcare setting while Chad and I worked full-time. I'll admit, I used to think that the $35 a day that I paid for childcare was outrageous. Now that I stay home and take care of only two kids at a time...and they're my own kids, I feel like I robbed the poor lady! I DIGRESS. While bitterly adding up what I'd be paying someone else to raise two of my kids once the baby was born, it made no sense for me to work full-time only to bring home less than one month's mortgage payment from a full year's salary after paying for childcare. Never, in a million years, did I ever expect that I would be so blessed to become a "SAHM." Don't get me wrong, I also see nothing wrong with full-time working parents...it just didn't fit properly into my family at this time. And I will say, I've worked in many different types of fields doing Administrative and project management work, but no job I've ever had has been as hard, difficult, or exhausting as being a stay-at-home-mom. BUT, no other job has ever been as fulfilling, either. I'm a chef, personal shopper, cleaning service, housekeeper, taxi service, bookkeeper, party planner and secretary. I don't get paid a salary. I get paid in hugs, kisses and unconditional love....and I am RICH!!!!
I have traded my heels for flats, , my dress clothes for yoga pants....side note, I don't do yoga....and my long hair, that took forever to style, for a super short pixie...which, I'm not gonna lie, I looooooove! I drive an SUV filled with toys, dvd players and Goldfish crumbs. My house looks like a tornado hit it from the inside, I sometimes have piles of laundry or dishes. But my kids are happy, Chad is happy, and all of this....makes ME happy!
I've recently felt compelled to start singing at church....even if my voice is, and I quote, "Not bad, but not extraordinary." (I won't mention who gave me that "compliment.") I stand on a stage in front of a whole congregation and sing. Again, not something I would have ever, EVER thought I could do....get on a stage.....in front of people......and sing. But, I feel that God has moved me to serve Him by leading worship with my less than extraordinary voice. I truly feel closest to Him when I am singing. My initial discomfort has put me into some of my most comfortable moments because I know God is with me.
Most recently, I've started reading by being involved in some groups with fellow Christians. Groups of people that I thank God every day for bringing into my life. They are all wonderful people! I have always backed away from reading, but I'm currently reading 3 different books all at once. And, in turn, I've been inspired to start writing again...hence, this blog. What better a starting point that to write about something you're well aware of or know a lot about? So the subject: Me and my life. However, I didn't know much about my own self until recently. I finally took the time to sit and think about who I really am while appreciating my life and everyone and everything that has been given to me by my Lord. Thank you, Lord Jesus, for my perfect life.
~Thanks for reading! xo
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